


the doc was called Halloween babeyy

by dduucckk



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: A lot - Freeform, F/M, First Meetings, Halloween, I wrote this in like an hour to make myself feel better, M/M, Remus Lupin & James Potter Friendship, Texting, Why??, bc we love them, bit of a crack fic ngl, dont ask me, enjoy, halloween party, naming pumpkins
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-31
Updated: 2020-10-31
Packaged: 2021-03-09 03:20:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 1,240
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27307633
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dduucckk/pseuds/dduucckk
Summary: a self indulgent halloween fic with pumpkin shenanigans, meet cutes, and texting.“They’re battle scars,” Remus repeated. “And you can’t call him just ‘pumpkin’ anymore, his official title is the PumpKing and he requires it to be used at all times.” Remus finished carving out the last scar, and picked up the sharpie to draw the outline of a crown near the top of the pumpkin. One he was satisfied, he picked up his knife and started cutting along the lines.“In that case,” James said, “Mine’s the PumPeasant and he looks like this because of a childhood disease.”
Relationships: James Potter/Lily Evans Potter, Sirius Black/Remus Lupin
Comments: 23
Kudos: 72
Collections: Modern Marauders





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [stagecrime](https://archiveofourown.org/users/stagecrime/gifts).



> y'all I wrote this bc I was having a Shitty Day and it also happens to be halloween it has not been read over even once do not expect quality just some random shit happening. I had fun with it tho, which is usually how I decide is a fics good or not. also it happened to fit with todays theme for kay's high school/college minifest so we're saying its for that even tho the college aspect is questionable

“Prongs, why does your pumpkin look like that?”

“You mean, _perfect_?”

“No, I mean like a toddler took a knife to it.”

“Fuck off, Remus, yours isn’t any better!”

Remus looked from his pumpkin to James’s. “I think I can see some differences.”

“ _Different_ does not necessarily mean _better_ , Moons, you should know that by now.”

“I’m gonna need you to fuck right off, mkay?”

James frowned at his pumpkin. As much as he had defended it, he was willing to admit that it needed some work. The nose had gotten a little bit too big and was now sort of merged with the eyes, and the mouth, which was supposed to be full of pointy teeth, looked like an old man’s toothless smile. He looked over at Remus’s pumpkin to compare.

“Why are you putting scars on your pumpkin?”

“So we match. He got them in battle.”

James blinked. “What?”

“They’re battle scars,” Remus repeated. “And you can’t call him just ‘pumpkin’ anymore, his official title is the PumpKing and he requires it to be used at all times.” Remus finished carving out the last scar, and picked up the sharpie to draw the outline of a crown near the top of the pumpkin. One he was satisfied, he picked up his knife and started cutting along the lines.

“In that case,” James said, “Mine’s the PumPeasant and he looks like this because of a childhood disease.”

“That’s the spirit,” Remus said absently. He finished cutting the outline of the crown and pressed in on it. It fell in, and he reached inside the PumpKing to take it out and put it one the table. Then he stood back to admire his work. “I think he’s done.”

“Good,” James said. “Let’s get these outside and start getting ready for the party. And Remus, I swear to god, if you wear that fucking wolf onsie again I _will_ smash the PumpKing and you’ll have to live with the fact that it’s your fault.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> why did I do separate chapters and then post them all at once? idk dont ask me

“ _Why_ didn’t I think to ban onesies entirely?” James groaned. Across the room, Remus grinned at him and flipped him off. James returned the favour. Lily snorted.

“You should have known better than to give him such an easy out,” she said.

“I know, but can you really blame me for not expecting him to have a Tigger onesie?”

“You live with him.”

“I don’t keep track of his onesies!”

Lily cleared her throat, which James suspected was an attempt at covering up a laugh, then checked her phone. “My friend should be here soon, he just texted that he’s on his way.”

“Your friend?”

“The one I told you about. From my chem class.”

“Oh, _him_!” James frowned. “Is this the same one youve been trying to introduce to Remus?”

Lily was suddenly very preoccupied with the label on her beer bottle. “Maybe.”

“Lils…”

“They’d be so good together! Remus just keeps saying no because he’s stubborn.”

“I mean, yeah. You’re right.” James thought for a moment. “Does your friend know that’s why you invited him here?”

Lily shook her head. “I don’t think he would have come if he did.”

“This idea is getting worse by the second.”

“Are you trying to imply that you haven’t had worse ideas, Potter?” Lily raised a teasing eyebrow.

“ _For you_ , this is a particularly bad idea.”

“Better.”


	3. Chapter 3

Remus was in the middle of a very loud and very heated discussion when he saw the pirate. He trailed off mid sentence as his eyes tracked the man across the room. He saw Lily watching him, and immediately turned back to his conversation, which had already moved on. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw the man greet Lily with a hug, and watched Lily introduce him to James, who shook his hand. Remus took another drink of beer.

It was a few minutes later when James waved him over, and Remus made his way through the crowds.

“This is Sirius,” James said. Remus smiled and held out his hand to the man.

“I’m Remus, James’s roommate. Nice to meet you.”

“You too. I like your costume.”

Remus looked down at his onesie. “I’ll have you know that I chose it mainly out of spite.”

Sirius laughed. “Good to know.”

Unnoticed by Remus and Sirius, James and Lily exchanged a look, then quickly turned away from each other before they started laughing.


	4. Chapter 4

“What’s up, Moons?”

Remus quickly turned off his phone and put it face down on the table. “Not much.”

“Really?” James made a grab for his phone, and Remus snatched it up off the table and held it against his stomach. James knocked over a can of _something_ left over from the night before, and it spilled all over the floor.

“That’s on you, you’re cleaning it up!” Remus said.

“What? No, it’s on _you_ because you wouldn’t give me your phone!”

“Absolutely not, it’s your fault for trying to take it.”

James poked Remus’s shoulder, then reached over and grabbed the phone.

“No, James!”

James darted out of Remus’s reach, unlocked the phone, and gasped dramatically. “You’re _stalking_ his _instagram_?”

“I’m not _stalking_.”

“Remus, this post is from three years ago.”

“Okay, so maybe I’m stalking. But James he’s so _hot_.”

“He’s Lily’s friend, you know, you can just ask her to introduce you. Or better yet, you can message him.”

“Why would I do that.”

“To get a date, obviously. Here, I can even do it for you.”

“Nope, nope nope, James, you are going to give me that phone back and it’s going to be like this never happened.”

“I…may have already sent it.”


	5. Chapter 5

**moony.lupin:** hey hot stuff ;) wanna meet up?

**moony.lupin:** holy FUCK im sorry, that was my flatmate

**siriusblck:** so youre saying im not hot stuff? :(

**moony.lupin:** ,,, not sure how im supposed to respond here

**siriusblck:** DO u think im hot stuff?

**siriusblck:** DO u wanna meet up?

**moony.lupin:** u know youre hot stop fishing for compliments

**moony.lupin:** but i mean if ur interested in a date

**moony.lupin:** id be down

**siriusblck:** wait rly???

**moony.lupin:** sure why not

**siriusblck:** yes ok i am intersected r u busy today

**siriusblck:** *interested

**moony.lupin:** nope! no plans today

**moony.lupin:** coffee? theres a place nearby thats really good

**siriusblck:** that sounds amazing

**siriusblck:** do u think theyll have christmas flavours yet???

**moony.lupin:** its nov 1

**moony.lupin:** why would they have xmas drinks on the morning of nov 1

**siriusblck:** a girl can dream


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> this chapter is texting, not ig message

**jamie <3:** remus just cancelled our plans to hang out w ur friend :(

**jamie <3:** buttttttttt your plan worked & youre amazing & smart & i love you

**jamie <3:** WHOOPS I DIDNT MEAN TO SAY THAT

**jamie <3:** SORRY LILS I DONT WANNA FREAK U OUT

**jamie <3:** IK WEVE ONLY BEEN DATING A FEW MONTHS BUT

**jamie <3:** i love u <3

**lilyflower:** james ur an idiot

**lilyflower:** i love you too tho

**jamie <3:** kjbckdjsbkbvhidsbjkdnbnakjsnbihsdkalkdn;c

**lilyflower:** ahhhahahahahahahhahahhahaha I BROKE U

**jamie <3:** I LOVE YOU

**jamie <3:** WANNA HANG OUT TODAY

**jamie <3:** remus cancelled our plans :(  


**lilyflower:** wow what a dick

**lilyflower:** yeah lets hang out love

**lilyflower:** <3

**jamie <3:** <3 <3

**lilyflower:** <3 <3 <3

**lilyflower:** do not get in a hearts competition with me potter or we’ll be here all day

**jamie <3:** ok <3 <3 <3 <3

**lilyflower:** <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks for reading y'all :)) writing this fully brightened up my day & I hope y'all liked it! maybe leave a comment and/or kudos? <3 😘

**Author's Note:**

> come say hi on [tumblr!](https://dduucckk.tumblr.com)


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